Hi, my name's Ludacris, and I'm high as giraffes (yeah)
And I'm close to the edge, so your parents can come push me
I curse so much just to get on they nerves
I got kids actin' a fool from the traps to the burbs.
My filthy mouth, it won't fight cavities or beat plaque
So I shot the tooth fairy (aah!) and took my old teeth back.
I'll take a shit on the equator, the size of a crater
And make government officials breathe harder than Darth Vader
It's the chicken and the beer that makes Luda keep rappin'
But no pork on my fork, I don't even speak Pig Latin.
I go fishin' on my lake, with your bitch as the bait
Plus I eat many MC's, but I don't gain no weight.
The number ONE chief rocker, clean out your rap lockers.
I'm as stiff as a board, you're more shook than maracas.
But my tricks ain't for kids, if you dig em' you'll get smacked
I'll clock ya, I'll spring forward, you fall back (woo)
Every album that I drop has got more than ten bangers (yeah)
That's cause I'm a shot caller, y'all fools are crank yankers (bells)
Ain't a damn thing changed but the ice on my chain.
I get chicks from Portland, Oregon to Portland, Maine.
Now I roll up torpedoes, get blunted with Rastas
For a hefty fee I'm on your record like Bob Castas (yeah)
I own so many jerseys, I'm a throw-back mess
I hit the cleaners and tell em' "I want a full court press" (ow)
So mama toast ya glass while I'm countin' my cash
Cause every single is a smash, I'm hot as a camel's ass (ha)
The competition never just wanna admit that they lost
And that they last about as long as my part in "The Wash"
From your car to crap game, no one rolls with you
One of Mini-Me's shoes got more soul than you (ok)
So by the time you figure out why your record ain't spinnin'
I'm in the strip club smokin', with President Clinton (cough cough cough)
So stand clear of the long side-burns and gold teeth (teeth)
They make the mold of the penis enlarger off me (me)
I'll be in another room when I hit from the back (back)
Not to mention my refrigerator's taller than Shaq (yeah)
So yippie ki ay, yippie yi yi yo (yo)
If you can't swim, don't smoke my hydro (dro)
I've been lookin' for a woman just to put my stamp on
But a lot of y'all are more stuck up than tampons (whoo)
So wash all your sins away and stop playin' (yeah)
If God's line is busy you might have to two-way him (uh hmm)
And catch me in your back yard, playin' croquet
And when I'm drunk, tellin' kids: "drugs are bad, mmm-kay?"
Or watch me swing my chains at the Rascals of Peko
Got seven cars, get all my rims at Chrome Depot
And people think I'm bad, they say "oh he's so evil"
Cause I go on blind dates, with actual blind people (ow)
But my album's out the store, yours be on the shelf (uh huh)
I heard you masturbate alot, so ya'll keep to yourself
Cause these women want a man to stay up and stay strong
Like the NBA, you gotta play hard or go home
All that shit that y'all talkin, y'all can pop it to them
Cause Ludacris will beat you down with a prosthetic limb
I'll put my foot so deep in your ass that you can smell it
And your breath will turn to Foot Locker water repellent
I'm the man, I got money far as the eyes can see
And I'm in a group I split dough with me me and me
So much money in my jewelry that I'm damn near sorry
So I'mma trade my earrings in, and get a Ferrari (whoo)
I buy cars wit straight cash, have meetings wit Donald Trump
Y'all meet wit Honda, no payments for 12 months (uh huh)
Take a look at your life and no wonder you're so sad
Y'all put up wit more shit than a colostomy bag
ha ha ha (fool)
Hip-Hop Quotables Lyrics performed by Ludacris are property and copyright of the authors, artists and labels. You should note that Hip-Hop Quotables Lyrics performed by Ludacris is only provided for educational purposes only and if you like the song you should buy the CD