I call you from my car to say I'll be there in awhile
A short plan ride and I will get to see your pretty smile.
There's nothing on the radio; I'd fiddled the dial
Then I see a sign: the airport is just another mile
I check my bags and think about how much I hate to fly,
And as I near security I almost start to cry.
Well I hope the law enforcement agent's can't tell from my face,
I got three balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place.
I'm sweating and I'm nervous and I need a little air,
'Cuz with four balloons of heroin, it's getting crowded up in there.
Crowded up in there.
My mind is all a-jumble and my blood is cold as ice.
I dread the thought of having to unload this merchandise.
Relax, I say, it's not so bad; it might be kinda nice,
Besides who hasn't had a finger up there once or twice.
I must remember don't leave any drugs inside the host;
I did that once and a girl who tossed my salad overdosed.
Well I say a little prayer "Hail Maria Full Of Grace",
I've got three balloons of coke in an uncomfortable place.
I'm sweating and I'm nervous and I need a little air,
And i swear i'm farting lines of blow into my underwear.
Ooh, from my derriere.
I was a little eager when I loaded up my stash
Five balloons of ecstacy, six balloons of hash,
Eight balloons of LSD, nine of sexy mild,
A box of Chinese fireworks, a Guatemalan child.
I made it to the gate and now my joy I can't contain.
I board the aircraft, take my seat in the cockpit of the plane-
As I taxi down the runway I get a smile on my face,
And I've got three baloons of coke in an uncomfortable place.
Flight crew, prepare for takeoff, as I lift us the air,
And by the way does anyone want to buy a Guatemalan child.
Oh, from my derriere.
I got Three balloons...
I got Three balloons...
I got Three balloons...
Three Balloons Lyrics performed by Stephen Lynch are property and copyright of the authors, artists and labels. You should note that Three Balloons Lyrics performed by Stephen Lynch is only provided for educational purposes only and if you like the song you should buy the CD