Well, I thought about the army
Dad said, "Son, you're fucking high"
And I thought, "Yeah, there's a first for everything"
So I took my old man's advice
Three sad semesters
It was only 15 grand
Spent in bed, I thought about the army
I dropped out and joined a band instead
Grew a mustache and a mullet
Got a job at Chick-Fil-A
Citing artistic differences
The band broke up in May
And in June reformed without me
And they got a different name
I nuked another Grandma's apple pie
And hung my head in shame, no
Been thinking a lot today
Been thinking a lot today
Oh, think I'll write a screenplay
Oh, think I'll take you to L.A.
Oh, think I'll get it done yesterday
Aw, shit
In this time of introspection
On the eve of my election
I say to my reflection
"God, please spare me more rejection"
'Cause my peers, they criticize me
And my ex-wives all despise me
Try to put it all behind me
But my redneck past is nipping at my heels
Thinking a lot today
Been thinking a lot today
Been thinking a lot today
I thought about the army
Army Lyrics performed by Ben Folds Five are property and copyright of the authors, artists and labels. You should note that Army Lyrics performed by Ben Folds Five is only provided for educational purposes only and if you like the song you should buy the CD