I woke up this morning with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again
This happens all the time
It's detachable
This comes in handy a lot of the time
I can leave it home
When I think it's going to get me in trouble
Or I can rent it out when I don't need it
But now and then I go to a party
Get drunk
And the next morning I can't for the life of me
Remember what I did with it
First I looked around my apartment and I couldn't find it
So I called up the place where the party was
They hadn't seen it either
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
'Cause for some reason I leave it there sometimes
But not this time
So I told them if it pops up to let me know
I called some other people from the party
But they were no help either
I was starting to get desperate
I really don't like being without my penis for too long
It makes me feel like less of a man
And I really hate having to sit down every time I take a leak
After a few hours of searching the house
And calling everyone I could think of
I was starting to get very depressed
So I went to the Kiev and ate breakfast
Then as I walked down Second Avenue
Towards St. Mark's place
Where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street
I saw my penis lying on a blanket
Next to a broken toaster oven
Some guy was selling it
I had to buy it off him
He wanted 22 bucks
But I talked him down to seventeen
I took it home, washed it off
And put it back on
I was happy again
Complete
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached
But, I don't know
Even though it's sometimes a pain in the ass
I like having a detachable penis
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Detachable Penis Lyrics performed by King Missile are property and copyright of the authors, artists and labels. You should note that Detachable Penis Lyrics performed by King Missile is only provided for educational purposes only and if you like the song you should buy the CD